Ten Things: I learned from writing my adoption profile

As part of our adoption packet that we received from our agency, we had what seemed like a million questions to read over and answer - some together and some as a couple.  They are meant to be insightful and help you dig deeper inside yourself and root out any unresolved issues you might have from your childhood, or issues there might be within your marriage.  My bio and answers took up what felt like 75 pages, and upon reflecting on the answers, there are some key points I want my children to know.

Ten Things I want My Children to Know

1.  The only thing I want from you is that you grow in virtue and honor to know and love your God.

2.  Fear must NOT dominate your life.  When you serve the Lord your God, you should never fear the path you are on - just pray for guidance and trust in Him.

Mia Burrito & I before Christmas Vigil Mass

3.  Always, always, always, stand by your family.  Honor them in your actions, respect them with your deeds, love them with your heart, speak in kindness and in truth.

4.  There will always be conflict.  Learn from those situations, they are like little gifts from God, sent to refine and mold you into something bigger and stronger than before.

5.  The little things you can do, you must...

6.  There is always someone less advantaged than you.  Praise God for the gifts He has given you, and always, always, pass on the fortunes you have been blessed with.  God did not pass these things on to you so that they would be horded or wasted.

7.  Do not desire what is "beautiful" or "cool."  These things get old, disappear, break, and always cost more money than a smart person would spend.  Live simply, and your worries will be simple.  Make your life complicated by these "things" and your worries will be complicated.

8.  Bullies do not just "happen."  Bullies are made through lack of love and true discipline.  Bullies learn their behaviors, they react with anger and hostility.  They act out of loneliness and despair.  Set a good example, stand up for the weak, and be a good friend.

9.  Always make copies of important papers and stay organized.  Make copies of your birth certificate before sending it in with your passport application.  Keep one file with all of your important documents and always have a back up copy.  (This is purely practical...who can afford $26 per copy of their birth certificate - especially if you have 5 kids?)

10.  Forgive.  There is nothing like answering a billion questions about your family, childhood, marriage, and life, to remind you that accidents happen and people will hurt you.  Your anger will shape you and your decision making abilities unless you forgive and mean it. Hold on to that anger and you are nothing more than a hamster stuck running on a wheel - you work so hard but can never get anywhere.