Day 2 in Country - Thursday

Thursday, the 20th – The Wait Begins

So our agency contact basically told us that we could do nothing until we not only hear the verdict on Feb 28th, but get it in writing which could be days (PLEASE PRAY THIS WAIT DOWN TO ZERO DAYS).  Father asked her if we could off to Masaka, and she that would be smart – keep our minds off of the first round of waiting.

So, Father got up first thing and got the tires and brakes replaced on the Land Cruiser.  This is a yearly necessity due to the quality of the roads.  While he was gone, we played soccer with Benny Michael in the courtyard with an almost completely flat soccer ball – but that is all that we had.  And just an FYI, he is a leftie with his feet and hands, but throw right.  Crazy kid, and Jane says that he could play soccer non- stop – just runs around kicking the soccer ball all day long. 

The Emmaus House had a small courtyard, and a very nice and talkative security card.  Jane (Michael’s caretaker at the Delta) stayed the night with us, and Michael had slept with her again on the first night. 

Sidebar:  I had prearranged Jane’s stay with us, with Father because I felt it was best to keep her there for the first day or two and slowly remove her from Benny’s presence, a nicer and slower path than the one that agencies normally take.  And I know each situation is different, but I thought this would be a more gentle, much less traumatic path than being dropped into the hands of someone you don’t know from Day 1 – never seeing the other people you grew up with again.  Can it make you a little jealous, watching him with her, and seeing their little bond?  Sure, but you have the rest of his life (possibly.)  She had maybe hours of each day over the past year.  Her role is a job/a paycheck.  Your job is your vocation, your sacrifice, your choice for the rest of your life.

After a few hours of soccer, Father showed up and we packed the Cruiser up again.  First of all, 8 pieces of full size suitcase, 2 carry-ons, 2 backpacks, and 3 adults and a baby means that it is a tight squeeze.  It was so tight in fact that we had to send Jane to the Maria Flo via a different method.  We paid for her to go home via a taxi or Boda Boda, her choosing.

Father was really angry with how the stay had gone so far.  He ended up telling us on the way home that he yelled at the lady in charge of the Emmaus, telling her that this hotel was an embarrassment to Uganda – that Ugandans were kind and hospitable and sincere, and this place had shown us none of those things.  I am glad to hear that his opinion of the place was the same as mine.  I kind of thought that it was just me being a snooty American.

And right when I thought we were packed in and on our way to Masaka, we decided to go to lunch at the Shop Rite strip mall.  When we went to lunch, Benny was seated between Paul and I, but when Paul and Father got up to go get the tablet fixed while I waited for the food – Benny freaked out.  He grabbed Father’s keys and tried to go chasing after Paul.  It was only the candy in my pocket that kept him by my side.  Praise God for sweeties right?  (And my children would be ridiculously jealous of how much soda Michael has had.  It is a popular drink for children, when they go out to get, and I was shocked by it.  I even told Father that Michael has been 6 glass bottles of soda in the past few days which might equal Anna’s life-long equivalent.  When we go someplace to eat, Benny sits between Paul and I, and we take turns cutting up food, feeding him etc. 

Adoption Side Bar:  All of the bonding books go into great length on the fact that food is the way to a child’s heart – that children follow where their meals come from, and that food brings a sense of security.  The new parents should go to great lengths to be the primary source of food and drink during these beginning months to keep a focus on us being his source of stability and feelings of fullness and happiness.  This is of course not quite as applicable if you have not had your child de-wormed yet because they are bottomless pits.  Father quite bluntly told us today that we need to de-worm Benny Michael.  Appalled at the thought, I know it is necessary, but do not know where to begin.  I will b going to the Wentz Clinic when I am back in Kampala, so I am sure I can get something there.  There are signs and posters all over the Shop Rite store in Kampala advertising de-worming products, I just am not sure what is appropriate for a child his age and size. 

So success?  Paul was able to run into the Orange store for them to fix my tablet, and after eating, we were able to pick up a new soccer ball for Benny Michael and squeeze in a case of water. We were packed to the gills, and I was mentally exhausted from our small Shop Rite trip.  First of all, Benny did not want to go in the cart and started to cry for Paul to hold him.  So he did, but then we walked down this aisle to get diapers, and he had seen a little tricycle and flipped out, screaming to ride on it.  I literally ran to the sports section, grabbed a soccer ball and we bolted for a check out line.  Picture a Big Lots store in terms of quality of the items there, but at ridiculous prices.  A tiny bottle of Dove shampoo was $10.  Diapers are almost $30 for the small pack that we got.  A case of water was $6.

Paul’s first touristy stop in the area was to the Ugandan Martyr’s Shrine.  I loved this tour last year, and was so looking forward to it, but kind of dreading taking Benny Michael out if public when we have such little control over him, as proven at Shop Rite.  But what are you going to do?  You can’t just sit there, you have to keep moving and doing things, not letting the whim of a child ruin your entire time here, and the only way he will learn is through trial and error is as closely controlled environments as the situation will allow for.

Before leaving the capital, Father also wanted us to go and hear the new song that he just recorded.  Along the very crowded streets of Kampala, he pulls down a narrow and twisty road, up a driveway that was easily cut at a 90 degree angle, and pulls up in front of a very tall home that was very nice by Kampala standards.  Inside, it looks like an American recording studio – leather couches, the logo on the wall, a trophy case for awards won in the realm of commercials, music production and music video production and direction.  And oh my goodness, the song was amazing.  It is a hip hop praise and worship song, one of the perfect dance songs.  While we were listening, one of Father’s music friends came down and heard the song and started going crazy – “Father you need to make a video, make a video please!!”  The only way to attract the youth in Uganda is through making dance music and producing music videos.  And the music videos are all Ugandan themed, Ugandan costumes, bright colors, etc.  They cannot afford to buy cds or downloads, so they get on the internet and load up on videos to watch, and host parties by playing the music that way.  It was awesome to see everyone’s expressions as they walked in to hear the song for the first time.  It is being mastered now, so your time will come soon.

Anyhow, upon getting to Masaka, I have never been so happy to be at this little hotel that held us before.  Last time we were here, I had this tiny cell block room at the Maria Flo, but because there were three of us, and Father pulled strings, we got a much larger suite.  We are not tripping over suitcases, I got to unpack, and organize what I brought – bags for Maria, boxes for Arthur, suitcases for Fr. Michael, a pile of items for Moses. Even though there is no power, they run the generators at key times during the day.  You can buy drinks from the concession stand, their kitchen is always open, the WiFi is pretty strong, and we feel comfortable.

Yay us.  I love to be organized.  I NEED to be organized.  I thrive on it.  Paul needs it.  If you want to reduce stress in an uncontrolled environment then you need to be able to control something.  If you cannot communicate normally, find a way.  If you have 8 suitcases that were completely mixed up and disheveled from repacking them to make weight, and you cannot find anything ever, then you will find so much peace in just knowing where everything is.  Tiny acts can make the biggest difference, no matter how stupid they seem.  

It was during this time, of cleaning, that Michael said “Daddy.” Yep – his first word ever.  Father Michael was so excited.  We had been practicing different words, we have always talked incessantly to our children and Benny had been mimicking sounds all day – everything we see, we say. “1 step, 2 steps, 3 steps.  Red car, blue car, yellow car. We love you. Mommy, daddy, eat, drink, happy, sad, kick, throw….”    So Paul goes into the bathroom to change, and I said, “Where is daddy?” and Benny leans overs looks down the hall and says, “Daddy.”  Our God is an Awesome God.

Notes from my prayer journal:  Today we sat, rested, and let our time and travel catch up with us.  It was late when we traveled from Kampala to Masaka, so we skipped the Equator trip with Paul, which we will need to do on the way back.  The day was mentally tiring and overwhelming.  It was Paul’s first time seeing the miles of massive and utter poverty and devastation that is a block away from beauty and awe that is Uganda.  And suddenly, you are in a safe little room, and you need to mentally adjust and unload, and you can’t sleep, and it can be overwhelming.

“Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.”

-1 Peter 5:7

 Soundtrack song of the day:  I’ll Be – Edwin McCain


Consecration begins today. I will reusing St. Louis DeMontfort's prayer structure with ease of 33 Days to Morning Glory's re5reattach type atmosphere. Join me or learn more and join me later.