Women’s Day

Saturday, the 8^th 

So after a long night, a quick trip to the clinic, a phone call to my children, and walking in on a huge rat hanging out in my room, I decided to call it quits for Friday, even thought it was 4 hours passed already. As a side note, if you want to get back into the compound after the restaurant part closes, you have to ring the bell, and then they lock a little door cut into the steel doors, and you climb through.  Not real graceful with a backpack on and a sleepy baby on my hip, but whatever works.  I also discovered that the bell is what rings at all hours of the night outside my bedroom window when the muzingos are coming home from drinking and sleeping their way through Uganda – double side note, they are studying at a college here and at least 2 of them are from Canada.

Saturday came with a flourish of activity outside.  Apparently Women’s Day means speeches at parks, concerts at churches, and baby showers everywhere, and all are done with absolutely no power.  Microphones and speakers are connected to large car batteries.  Don’t ask me how, but I had seen this done at Fr. Michael’s church and it was effective.  The power must have been shut off after I found the rat, because believe me, I had every light on that I could find.

I got 5 hours of sleep, and woke up feeling much better after the medication and shot I got last night.  Super excited about it, I only had a bit of queasiness and a headache, but that is better still the same.  I had enough of an appetite to eat a few bites of pineapple, and I split a chicken wrap with Michael.  I normally get 1 meal and split with him, and I thought we would try the chicken wrap and get a fruit salad, and 4 drinks, 2 more then and 2 for our room.  For someone keeping track, that is about $15 US, or 32,000 UGX.  Also, in case you were wondering how we are eating cooked things, the kitchen runs off of propane tanks connected to make shift stove tops and grills.  There is a deep fryer in the back connected to a propane tank for the deep fried tilapia that seems to be a local favorite, and a very costly one at that 85,000 UGX gets you a whole tilapia, fried, with French fries and cucumber. 

First thing that I had to do was discover how a rat got into the room.  Well hello Allison, that is because there are no screens in your windows (even though it looks like there is – the frames are empty), and the glass is broken in your windows.  So even though you do not shut your windows at night because of the heat, you draw the curtains shut to stop mosquitoes, but curtains won’t stop rats.  Lesson learned.  Must find a driver to take me to the store and get a trap or spray or drops or something.  I told the head lady, and she said that she would send someone in to put out some drops of stuff, but that was almost 8 hours ago, and still no sign of drops.

We have no power today, so when Linda had said that she would take me to the store today, I am thinking it will not be possible.  I had wanted to run to a place called Cafetesserie.  Linda said it was the whitest place in town (which is not why I want to go there) but that it serves the best American and French style breads in probably the whole country.  I thought it would be nice to bring each of the women that work here a little treat for Women’ Day.  I feel badly that they are working, and they work ridiculously hard and they make few schillings.  Since they do not get the day off like supposedly the rest of the women in town, I was trying to brighten their day.

Normally, when we are without power for too long though, the stores close early as to not drain their generators.  Most places do not have solar generators because they are too expensive to get and too expensive to repair.  When you do get one, normally it is a knock off version of a high end American or Japanese company.  So the generators run on gas, the cost of which is ridiculous as well.  In our hotel, we have one generator that is connected to 1 light in each room.  Most hotels keep the fridges on generators, but this hotel only has only two small drink fridges which are not connected to generators.  Japanese imports are the most highly sought and most readily available, look at the vehicles here.  They are 99.9% Toyotas, although styles and names that I have never seen.

The only mall in the whole country that is both brand new, and that has air conditioning is the Acacia.  It is beautiful, and it is where an American would feel most at home.  It houses the Cafetesserie, KFC, book stores, a children’s play center, and ice cream parlor, and some clothing and shoe stores.  It is a company that is local but run by a larger company in the UAE, and the design shows it – beautiful architecture, very modern and spacious, complete with fountains, living full size trees, ponds, etc. 

Linda said that the first time she went it was almost complete white people.  She said that she worries because with the bombings and Islamic terrorists so close, and bombing and besieging malls and centers in Kenya, that this would be a prime target in Uganda; “A mall full of Americans, prime for the picking.”  I promised that if we ever needed to go there, I would be in and out before a terror suspect made it through the metal detectors and hand wand security officials. 

I like the idea of it because it is close to where I stay, maybe 5 minutes away maximum, and seems to have a lot of conveniences that I might want to call upon, although I am still hesitant to take Benny Michael into an uncontrollable environment such as that.  Maybe if I had a stroller or something of a similar nature, and he was well fed and sleepy, then I could push him around and it would be nice.  If he were at his prime, I might want to rip my hair out, but if it were full of Americans, at least they might understand.  When I took Linda to lunch at KFC, I heard too many British accents and South African accents for it to be all American, but religious intolerance does not really differentiate between country.

Benny and I had to spend the day in our rooms for the most part.  We went out to play soccer twice, but there is a he baby shower and party being thrown in the courtyard and restaurant which means crackers and apples and water for dinner, and maybe a protein bar for dessert.  Which is fine by me, but Benny keeps putting his shoes on and picking up his soccer ball and trying to escape.  It is hard to explain to him that the yard is ot our, we share it with everyone who pays to rent it.

Linda stopped by when I finally got him down for a nap.  She wanted to check on my Mass plans for tomorrow, and update me on this coming week.  She is very concerned because there are like 4 American families coming next week and she is very concerned about their first items slowing down our progress.  She says she is hoping a passport by Wednesday, and then making an appointment to file our IOM case.  The IOM used to be two steps, but for the past few months, it separated into 3 steps.  Instead of just having the medical appointment and then having the TB read, you have to go and open a case first, then go to the IOM appointment, and then go back to have the TB read.  So when we were told by our agency that is was about a week long process involving two trips, they were wrong.  The IOM still only sees us three days a week, so the ticket there is timing.  She also went on to explain that missing a free day or any opportunity to push things forward can delay things by weeks.  I have been lucky because there are very few adoptive families here right now, so things are slow and I can slide through easier.  In 1 week, I will not be so lucky.

They purposely do not give adoptive families information about each other.  We have no idea where they stay, we are not encouraged to get together, to console each other, to let our kids play with each other, or to stay at the same places.  This is because, women in particular, feed off each other.  The more Americans there are in one place, the more likely they are to become rowdy, anxious, worried, bossy and rude.  They start making demands based on lack of education and knowledge, and it can get very ugly.  I totally can see that happening, but as someone who is utterly by herself, it might be nice to have an adult conversation with an American who is facing similar challenges. 

Linda said that most Americans though come in groups of 2-4.  “Nobody comes here, just one person, which is why I am trying extra hard to get you out faster – doing this alone will drive a person crazy – especially living alone in such stressful accommodations.” (Yeah, tell me about it.)  I saw this the other day at the mall; a husband and wife, a grandpa, and a daughter, and they had the girl they were adopting.  I saw a second group that was a husband, wife, two children and a grandma.  I can see how that would be a huge help and a blessing.  A group that size though would shut down a bed and breakfast type place.  Most places I have stayed have only had 6 rooms, and that group alone required 3.  No wonder it was so hard for me to find a place to stay when I was calling around from the US.

Anyhow, Linda expressed her concerns with us moving quickly, especially once hearings begin.  As soon as the rulings are issued, then a whole group of families will enter the system and they can easily ruin it for me.  If they are pushy and demanding, or rude or bossy or obnoxious at the passport office, IOM, or with the embassy, then the people working at those places can take out their frustrations on me.  She was very happy that I have been so levelheaded and gracious to people because, “Americans will ruin it for future Americans in a heartbeat.  That is why we are here today with this messed up lengthy process.  It used to be that I helped find a place for families to stay, got them a driver, etc.  But typical Americans would come in and say ‘this place is gross, you gave us horrible recommendations, we are leaving’ and then hotels would hate us for it.  They would go to the embassy whenever they wanted and be pushy and disorganized and waste the embassy’s time by not being prepared, and now you have to email for appointments, can only come in once for filing, and even more problems. Not everyone is as chill as you.”

I can see the issue, and I will work diligently at doing the only thing I can do – praying.  I promised her I would continue with patience and graciousness, and that I was willing to do whatever need to be done to be out of here faster, even though 3 trips to the IOM could extend my stay by a week or two.

Keep up the prayers, they are working!!

Notes from my prayer journal:  Today, I read that if I seek Him first, and keep my eye upon His will, then all will fall into place.  The more I fight him, the more difficult I make things for myself.  Ahh, how perfect his will is, so why do I fight it.  I will keep my eyes resting upon His Sacred Heart so that it is easier for me to accept the hang ups that may come, the challenges that I face, and the angst that comes with taking up the cross of Christ.

“Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.  My soul clings to you; your right hand upholds me.”

-          Psalm 63:7-8

Soundtrack song of the day –  Lazy Eye – Silversun Pickups

Consecration to Jesus through the Immaculate Heart of Mary, Visions of 1947, day 17

The Novena to the Divine Mercy, Day 8, those who are in purgatory

PS. Tomorrow I will call a driver myself, go to Mass with Michael by myself, and maybe even go to the store.  And when my agency told me that it was "20,000 UGX a day so squeeze in as many trips as you can" they were insanely wrong.  First you tell them where you are going, then they stop at the refueling station, and you pay for their fuel.  And then you pay a separate amount for each place you go. Each stop is 20,000 UGX and if they have to wait for you while you are in the store, or Mass, or Passport compound, it can be up to 80,000 UGX.  So to go to the passport office, it was 20,000 UGX.  He left and went and worked while we were there, and then we called him, and the trip home was 25,000 UGX and only God knows why.  Linda said that f I had him wait, it would have been 80,000 UGX.